What I'm Wearing:
Jacket: The WeekendXH&M , Shirt: Calvin Klein, Tie: Calvin Klein, Pants: Forever 21, Shoes: Perry Ellis, Socks: Happy Socks
"I Feel It Coming"
You ever feel like life is just a pattern, like the patterns you see on your socks, or on my socks. We are living in a world where the circle of life is in constant rotation. On the page before this I talked about changing. Now I want to talk about the effect of change. Change causes a chain reaction. I mean look at the world around us, everyone is reacting to all the recent changes in many different ways. And no I'm not here to vent about political issues, I'm here to build upon the changes i'm making in my life and how my outfits are reflecting that change and honoring the road i've traveled on so far.
I just had a little laugh to myself because, I looked at the photos from this shoot and I feel as if i'm burying a part of who I used to be, but honoring who I am now with the touches of green. I told myself as 2017 came around, I wanted to experiment with street wear and try my hand at it more than usual. That all came to life when Happy Socks approached me for a 5 outfit collaboration for my blog. As I was putting together ideas for my outfits, I thought to myself how do I make these socks stand out with how I'm feeling, and what I want to feel. These green socks, crazy design and all, show that I want to let loose a little more. It's like a snapshot into my soul. My soul is on fire. My emotions have been all over the place since I turned 22, 2 weeks ago. Barely 24 hours after my birthday I decided to swim into more uncharted waters. Now I won't share what I've done with you here, but I can assure you, you'll hear about it on my next record. I have to pick and choose what I share with you because i'm always writing. It doesn't matter if it's a letter to you or a song I'm writing, all parts of my life are eventually written and heard. These socks describe that messed up feeling you have inside, when you don't know if the decision you made is right or wrong. Your mind tells you it may be wrong, but your heart tells you it's time, its right, don't listen to your mind. Part of why I titled this post "I feel it coming" is because I'm wearing this really dope jacket from The Weeknd's collab with H&M, but the other reason why I titled it this, is because I do feel it coming. Now I know your wondering, what is it that I feel coming? Well for starters, I have been vaguely open about my plans for the latter half of the year. I am planning on moving back home to LA, disease and all. No manager, no producers, just me, my stories, and my voice. Things I feel coming are nerves, fear, and strangely enough, hope. I feel hope. That brings it back to the circle of life. My life is coming full circle once again in a strange way. I moved to LA at 17 with a lot of hope, and I plan on going back with more hope than before. After being trapped here in the Bay Area for the past 3 years, I will be the first to admit that the hospital life has gotten old. Not being able to travel for the last 3 years has been hard. I've gotten so used of the routine I have gone through weekly. I feel that I'm coming head to head with who I used to be and who I am now, and both worlds are about to collide, just like the green and black in this outfit here. They both come together and collide to make a perfect blend to tie together every emotion i'm feeling inside. What I feel coming is, i'll be saying goodbye to the life i've gotten used to, and returning to a life I haven't lived for 3 years. I somehow have to combine the 2 and make it work just like the socks here. They work, and look at them they stand out. I'm pretty sure whatever I come up with, with the new and old combination of Dom Baza, i'm gonna stand out like the Happy Socks here.
Honestly you can tell my mind is in so many different places at once, but I can't vent about everything with you guys. I feel as if I had to find a way to write around what I originally wanted to write about. What I want to say is not meant to be said yet. Maybe on another page of this story, or even the next chapter. I think I gave you a clear idea of the emotions i'm feeling though. Do any of you feel like this after you get another year older? Then again in my years, i'm basically not even 22, i'm somewhere way beyond that. I talked a little about hope earlier. I brought it up, but I wanted to bring it up as I close this letter and turn the page. If you listen to the lyrics of "I feel it coming", you all know what the true meaning of that song is about.... but somehow I found hope in it, strange I know, but Able sings about his girl and how she's been hurt, and the journey she's been on with her previous relationship. He's giving his lover hope and reassurance when he says "You've been scared of love and what it did to you, you don't have to run, I know what you've been through." I think we can all relate to that some way. We try to run, but somehow we always end up running right into our problems and we are then forced to face them. In our darkest hours and the our somber moments we crave hope, "hope is what we crave", while we step into the next evolution of changes in our lives.
Photographer: Joanna Wheeler
Every post I will include the song that inspired me to build a post around it's title.
2 Years In My Life: Chapter 1